The balance of giving and receiving

Give and take. Push and pull. Yin and yang. Black and white.

The world is full of dualities. One can even say that life is the “gray matter” that exists between the light and the dark. When focused on either extreme, things become, well, rather extreme. But back to the “give and take” part . . .

It resonates deeply within me that “what you give is what you get.” Giving is such a beautiful act. Whatever you put out there comes back to you tenfold! You smile at a stranger, you feel good inside, they then smile at someone, who smiles at someone . . . it’s a magnificent ripple effect. To give from the heart without expecting anything in return is a wonderful way to live. Giving for the sake of giving. Pouring out your love without expecting anything in return. And then if something does come back to you, it is a surprise and all the more beautiful. But the balance of giving and receiving is a fine line. Perhaps it is because I have several planets in the sign of Libra (“the Scales”) that I am so passionate about creating balance in every part of life. Balance in relationships, balance in diet, balance in work/play, etc. Is true balance possible to attain? Or is it some ideal we aspire to reach? How uncomfortable are those relationships or situations where you feel you are constantly giving and another is constantly taking? As time passes and that same dynamic continues to play out, feelings of being “used” start bubbling up inside. All of the spontaneous giving on your part is then stifled by the other’s constant consumption. There needs to be a fair balance for relationships to be sustainable. If your partner is the one who always pay for the bill, eventually the imbalance will begin to manifest. People can only feel like doormats for so long until they begin to resent it. Then the way that many people will try to restore the “balance” is by no longer giving at all. Again – extreme!

So on the other end of the spectrum, how about the ones who are constantly receiving (a.k.a. “taking”)? To be an open gateway for receptivity is such a gift. But to abuse the beauty of receiving is to bite the hand that feeds you. To constantly receive without giving back is like becoming a thief. It is taking for granted that at some point the source of love/giving may dry up and fade away. There is no need to live life selfishly and fight tooth and nail to hoard love, gifts, attention, etc. Life is all abundant and there is more than enough to go around. Yes, you are worthy of receiving, but you need to give back too. Breathe in and receive. Breathe out and give back. Eat fruits from the earth, and then replant some seeds. Enjoy a delicious dinner your friend prepared, and then do the dishes.

I have recently had alot of my personal feelings in regards to giving/receiving come to light. I am always eager to give a friend a back massage or help them out in any way, but when they try to return the favor, I realize that my tendency was to back away from receiving anything at all. I felt it more right to give, give, give, than to ever receive. Until the other day I realized this pattern and I thought to myself, “maybe I haven’t been comfortable with receiving tokens of love and appreciation because I have been feeling unworthy.” Awareness is definitely Step 1! Then I opened up to the idea of “I am more than worthy! I deserve to receive!” and things completely shifted. I became comfortable with receiving love, compliments, and gifts because I know that I will always give back to that person, tenfold! You really do learn alot about the people and situations in your life when you practice the art of allowing. Not telling people that you feel shorted and want something in return (although clear communication is vital), but sitting back and taking notice of who steps up to the plate to constantly give from the heart. Holding space for each other and knowing that all is done in complete authenticity. Keep those people and situations that you feel a balanced dynamic from in your life, for they are rare gems indeed!

I know that it all starts from within. Inward to outward. What you are feeling and experiencing on the inside is what you are likely to see come to form externally. So it is important to be mindful and always take the time (everyday!) to love yourself and nurture yourself first. If you are feeling nourished and at your best, you will be better equipped to help the world and be more content with allowing & living in the moment. Take care of of yourself by eating well, relaxing, enjoying your favorite activities, exercising, and sleeping an adequate amount. Feel the love that comes from honoring yourself and receiving goodness/nourishment down to the cellular level. When you feel complete from within, the magnitude with which you can give is exponentially increased! And the amount you can receive as well! We are all one. What affects one affects all. So be at your best, treat people the best, and you’ll receive the best. Keep the loving cycle flowing. As my Reiki Sensei said the other night, “As you heal, I heal. And as I heal, you heal.”

The Earth is ever-abundant and is constantly giving us goodness. I invite you to send loving vibrations to the moon, the ocean waves, trees, and animals. Touch the soft grass with a loving hand. Stand on the Earth with deep appreciation. Feel what you receive in return. It’s impressive and spectacular! With the amount of people “taking” from Mother Earth, she is incredibly receptive to the slightest loving touch. One appreciative gesture to our Earth is more powerful than several gestures of destruction. Be the Light and be an ambassador for restoring harmony: within yourself, within your relationships, and within the Earth.

I give you love and I receive your love. 🙂



4 thoughts on “The balance of giving and receiving

  1. Great reading ❤

    I think the balance is key. Some people get too caught up in taking, or giving sometimes. Sometimes people give without regard to the real benefit, just to feel good that they have given. I think the balance of real beneficial giving (that benefits both parties, not just makes you feel good), and beneficial taking (where you invest in self worth, and make yourself more valuable to others, thereby benefiting all), is the best balance.

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